It's nearly 1 am and we're all up. Momma is walking around demanding to be let out, and messing with stuff when she can't get out. Bubs is in a foul mood, and to be honest so am i. Scratch that- momma has decided she is sleeping down here in a chair, has turned out the light and turned off the television. I slept from ten something until maybe twelve thirty, bubs gives me a hard time about falling asleep early like that but it helps with times like this. The thing is that, in order to make it to work remotely on time i really ought to be up by six. Five hours to sleep and counting down- thank God i have a flexible job that forgives tardiness.

on cars and busses

This weekend i went to Philadelphia to stay with Xh. and her husband, and see V. and her family. These two women were the other two "muskateers" in college, and remain two of my absolute closest friends. Thank God the visit went very well, and was very fun! V's kids are almost painfully cute, and both ladies married splendidly Godly, kind, and geeky men. On Sunday afternoon/evening Xh. suggested the book Lafcadio during a reading session. Now one website states that the book has 112 pages. That night we read the-entire-book, with only a break for dinner. i put the effort in to try and read it somewhat well as well, with inflection, song, voices, etc. By the end i was actually getting kind of light headed, yet we persevered through. Why, you may ask? Because when you have a 5 and a half year old and an almost 3 year old cuddled on next to you on the couch, it's easy to keep reading. When that 5 and a half year old brings the book to the dinner table where you're still sitting, reminding you that you agreed to read more after dinner it is difficult to say no. After all, what's a short spurt of light headedness when compared to an hour or so of childish delight?

The last time i went to Philadelphia was to see a British friend, S., who had purposefully scheduled a layover in that city into her trip so we could reunite. Xh. met us there, very kindly. That time, i was planning to take the bus in, but at the last minute a friend offered to ride with me, as she wished to visit her daughter anyway. That trip turned into- well it's a long story but the short version is that it turned into one of those trips where you say, "if we survive this we will have a great story". There actually was concern about surviving it at one point. P's foot apparently slipped off of the accelerator and onto the brakes while crossing a road. This stopped us in-the-road-in-front-of-an-oncoming-dump-truck-in-an-old-car-without-side-airbags. i was on the side facing the truck. Only God's grace got us through. While we may discuss the trip here someday in more detail, the part pertinent to this post is that after that the decision to take the bus next time seemed somewhat logical.

However, this weekend i decided to bus it, and was delayed for hours due to confusion, etc.

Thank God by the way that i was able to drive through the tunnel during the earlier trip!! That's a big step for me.

mayhaps more to come.

Today was Thanksgiving, and it feels like a good time for a post. This morning in the shower (because, you know, the best thinking occurs in the shower) i was thinking about my life. Let me tell you, my life is not necessarily where i thought it would be. However, in so many ways it is so much better.

God has blessed me so much with a family to love. He's given me purpose. He's given me a job with meaning doing work that i really kind of enjoy. He's given me a corner office, where i can be eccentric and weird and no one really cares as long as my work gets done. (That's kind of been a daydream of mine.) He's given me a dog and two cats, a house, membership on a board, great friends. He's given me elderly relatives to love. He's given me the golden years of their lives, the knowledge that some day if i'm looking back on my life i can say that i was there. He's given me a church family. He's given me a measure of contentment in my singleness. If He never gives me a helpmate, He's given me the assurance that He is there for me. He's given me an idea of the things being single could free me to do, and yet the lingering possibility that it may go the other way and that could be good too. He's given me a decided settling of the tumult that has been my emotions and mindset in the past.

He's given me love. He's given me hope. He's given me faith. He's given me salvation. He's given me life. He's given me contentment. He's given me protection. He's given me health. He's given me forgiveness. He's given me mercy. He's given me guidance. He's given me Help. He's given me a Rock to lean upon. He's given me everything.

Happy Thanksgiving God. Thank You for well absolutely everything, really!!

A not-entirely unusual moment

In this family we're weird, but in my opinion it's wonderful. Take what occurred earlier (it went something like this):

Momma started going through Bubs' wallet. This was bothering him quite a bit. The wallet, like the i-phone and the macbook are items which he is particularly careful of. As his frustration and fear rose, momma continued to take items out of the wallet. Personally, i think she was kind of amusing herself with his distress. Still, it was beginning to become one of those interactions which can quickly take the mood of the moment south.

So i took pity on him and grabbed the cards from her.

"Momma, you have to put those down."

"Why?"

"Because bubs' is getting all Asberger's about it."

i once rifled through my DSM diagnosing bubs. Ever since i read him the characteristics of Aspergers, he has occasionally decided that he has it. This is not written with any disrespect toward people who do have it. I was very close with one of my youth group kids with this condition. The comment, however, was enough to break bubs out of his bad mood, and he kind of smiled.

"I thought you said I didn't have it." (After originally reading him the criteria, I have told him that I don't really think he has it. That's true as well.

"Momma's mad at you," at this point she was pointing the remote at him and pushing buttons, clearly enjoying herself immensely.

"Obviously, she's trying to turn me off."

She's been doing this lately, carrying around the remote control and using it as a life control. It's quite frankly adorable.

Apparently today while she and bubs were taking a car ride (giving me time to work on a grant from home) he was telling her that the remote would not work on anything in the car. It just so happened though that she pushed the button when Pandora came on. She proceeded then to continue using the remote to control things. It made her very happy, i think.

The best in my opinion is still when she uses it to control us.

Thank God, yet once again for, for my family, as crazy as we are.

oh sandy

So the east coast is currently in the grips of Hurricane Tropical Storm Cold Storm Sandy. Thank God we are doing quite well actually. There's still power here, and the wind and rain is not terribly bad. The girl we "adopted" into our family some years ago has called to check on us, and offered to send a rescue helicopter (or camel). Currently, she's chatting with momma, and the conversation is adorable, as momma says her cards aloud. Solitaire, as always, is a huge blessing of God, in the cognition and amusement of our most beloved momma bear.

The last few days have been a flurry of storm preparation off and on. Actually, that's not entirely true as yesterday was Sunday and mostly i rested and did church. However, Saturday involved buying groceries, buying lights, doing laundry, and finding batteries. Today, after work (which ended at noon), i ran around and tried to secure items which might possibly have blown away, or had neighbors shooting us dirty looks. Also, i asked mom to shower (more complicated than it might sound) and baked two boxes of muffins (a competitor for momma's favorite food).

i told a friend that i would rather be paranoid and prepared, then caught unawares. Even if, as would be wonderful, there is no extended power outage, or serious wind and rain here, i thank God i was able to prepare.

i want to try now not to complain, regardless of what might happen. Even if the power does go out and stay out, i would like not to complain. So many others are going through so much more. Prayer would be a good hobby for us, directed toward those in need.

Random Thoughts

Why does bear worry about using toilet paper and paper towels (which are super cheap), but not worry about using other things to wipe her hands with, which are decidedly more expensive, after all.

Praise God!! Momma's finished physical therapy, but they gave us an amazing present today. Since her Medicare wouldn't cover it, they forgave us the co-pays. That was $25 a session, for three sessions a week, for probably 4 or 5 weeks.

God was good to me tonight, when i was kind of down and pitying myself. (He's good to me all the time of course.) While walking around internally moping, my dog sat there just calmly. After petting him once, it occurred to me that God could use him to cheer me up.

Thank God i've been getting up and to work close to on time a lot lately. This means perhaps less sleep. It also means an easier time getting hours in. God is good all the time. All the time God is good.

On why physical therapists are da bomb

Speaking of "da bomb", kids don't say that anymore do they?

It's like a recent Friday night, where bubs and i took our 16 year old niece and 13 year cousin bowling.

Afterward, i referred to something as "sketchtastic". By their teenaged reactions, i gathered that this particular term was no longer "hip".

Laughing it off mostly, i turned shortly thereafter for solace to the Facebook community. i threw it out to my friends, asking them to back me up on the coolness of this word.

No one responded that they had even ever heard of it.

Sigh.

But i digress.

The bear (a derivative of momma-bear, bub's nickname for her) has begun physical therapy.

Thank and praise God for physical therapy!!

It was a suggestion by her doctor after protracted periods of complaining about pain.

See momma has degenerative disc disease, or arthritis, or whatever you want to call it, in her neck. This has led to neck and back pain.

Yet her doctor told us there was really no way to treat it except to a.) medicate for the pain and b.) have surgery.

Surgery is something i do not want to put momma (or us) through if it's not really important.

The doctor agreed with not putting her through surgery.

So the back thing is something we've been dealing with for at least a few years now. At mom's last appointment, when i broached the subject the doctor said the soothing words.

Physical therapy.

i was dubious at first. i took her the first day, and watched the young therapist like a hawk. i fretted over the way he was manhandling her head and neck. i asked questions about risks to her while trying not to seem like i was rudely questioning his expertise. i made certain to point out to him that she was breakable. i seriously considered asking the receptionist if this therapist was really good at his job, after he admitted to me that this was his first job after his graduation last spring. i mentally wondered if there was a way to request the other therapist without causing offense.

It's been nearly two full weeks later however, and i've relaxed a lot. The practice we are taking her too is close. The two therapists and the receptionist are superbly kind to momma, joking with her and rolling with inappropriate questions and repeated reminders of certain items. The therapist did undergo seven years of schooling, even if this is his first job (my sister reminded me). They are accommodating of her- after one session where she was fretful and freezing they began putting heating pads on her prior to working with her. There are various reasons why i'm grateful for physical therapy, and this practice in particular.

The thing is that it appears to be working. There seems to be an observable decrease in pain complaints.

God is good and cares even about the little things.